


Philautia

by rwleispiach



Series: Notions of Love [4]
Category: Outlander & Related Fandoms, Outlander (TV), Outlander Series - Diana Gabaldon
Genre: F/M, Masturbation, jealous jamie, reassurance, self love
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-07
Updated: 2021-01-07
Packaged: 2021-03-18 01:54:47
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,481
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28610175
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/rwleispiach/pseuds/rwleispiach
Summary: Claire comforts a jealous Jamie.
Relationships: Claire Beauchamp/Jamie Fraser
Series: Notions of Love [4]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2023382
Comments: 6
Kudos: 42





	Philautia

**Author's Note:**

> I had so much fun writing this! 
> 
> Huge Huge thank you to swedishlassie, aussieoutlander, and era_r for being the best betas and for dealing with all of my questions. ❤❤❤
> 
> Moodboard is on twitter @rwleispiach

Philautia is self-love 

I always managed to wake up before Jamie; it was my favorite part of the morning, being able to watch him smile in his sleep. 

We were lying in bed when Jamie awoke. He slowly turned to me and gently placed his hand on my face, caressing my cheek with his thumb. But something was off, he was looking through me instead of being in the moment with me. 

“What's wrong, Jamie?” I asked.

“Nothing, I'm just thinking,” he said sitting up. I followed suit, sitting beside him, lying my hand on his arm. 

“You're lying. Hey, what's wrong?” I said, a little more concerned. 

“Ah dhia, fine,” he tutted, “I was just wondering if every time we have sex... Does Gillian have to be here?” he tutted. 

“Jamie, of course she doesn't. It's just something fun that the three of us seem to enjoy,” I shifted my hand to his thigh, trying to find his eyes with mine. 

“Do ye like having sex with her? Perhaps more than me, sassenach?” 

There was a subtle sadness in his voice when he asked me that question. Refusing to look at me, he instead played absentmindedly with my fingers. He was so cute, sitting there, pouting. It was rare that Jamie spoke of his insecurities. He would let them slip every once in a while, but never like this. This must have been on his mind for quite some time. 

I tilted his chin towards me, forcing him to look at me. 

“Jamie, remember, what it is between us is different. I love you. I married you. And I love what we have together,” I squeezed his hand, rubbing my thumb across his hand. “Yes, sex with Gillian is different, but it's nothing compared to having sex with you. There's a passion, a heat between us that no one could ever compete with. You do things to me, make me feel things that I- I didn't know were possible.”

He helped me into his lap so that I was straddling him and his hands settled on my arse, his favorite place. 

“With Gillian, it’s just sex, it’s fun. With us, we’re connecting, making up, expressing our love for each-” His lips were on mine, shutting me up. His tongue skirting over my lip and I opened my mouth to let him explore a place he already knew so well. 

“I love ye,” he said gratefully. 

“I love you too, Jamie.” I breathed, as I leaned in to kiss him, just a quick kiss , but he pulled me closer to his body, one hand on my arse and the other in the middle of my back. He ran his tongue across my lip, trying to deepen the kiss, but teasingly I pulled away, licking his lip as he chased after my mouth. 

I shimmied back a little bit so that I was laying in between his legs, my own draped over his and spreading my thighs wide so I was on full display for him. The only thing between him and me was my panties. 

His eyes darted between my eyes and my center. Licking his lips, he extended his hand to touch me, but I pushed it away. 

“No,” I said forcefully. 

“You can watch, but no touching,” I said, biting my finger while my other hand was busy kneading my breast.

My hips moved in circles, grinding my hips in the space between us. 

I pulled my t-shirt over my breasts, so he could have a full view. 

My breath was shaky, I didn’t know why I was nervous. Jamie had seen me touch myself before, but this time I felt so vulnerable. 

Pushing those thoughts aside, I put my foot on his chest, and shimmied out of my panties, letting them dangle around my foot until he slid them off. 

Hanging my legs back over his, I ran my hands over my body. Stopping to flick, and pull at my erect nipples, rolling one between my fingers, while my other hand worked its way between my legs. Locking eyes with Jamie, I slowly ran my hand over my folds, separating my lips. Using a finger, I ran it teasingly over the place he thought was his.

Letting out a low moan, I touched my clit, taking it between two fingers, massaging it, moving my fingers in circles.

Letting my other hand move from my breasts to my pussy, I thrust two fingers inside myself, my head dropping from the sensation. 

I began moving my fingers slowly at first, then increased the speed while my other hand was busy playing with my clit. 

“Jamie, I need more” I moaned breathlessly. Knowing exactly what I meant 

Knowing exactly what I meant , he quickly detangled himself from my body, and pulled it out from my nightstand— I didn’t need to ask him to also get the lube, he did it automatically. I watched as he smothered the tip, then took his finger and rubbed the lube inside of me. 

I rubbed the vibrator along my folds, not breaking eye contact with him. Slowly I aligned it with my center and pushed it inside of me; my jaw dropping from the waves the vibrations created within me. 

“I want you to come for me Jamie,” I purred. He moved to get up, but I stopped him.

“No, I want to see you touch yourself.” 

He slid his boxers down, releasing his already erect cock, his eyes never leaving mine.

“What are ye thinking about, Claire?” he sighed as he fisted his hand around his length. 

“I’m thinking about what it feels like when you’re inside me. When you’re slamming into me, making me scream,” I moaned. 

“Tell me more. What would I be doing to ye, Claire?” he whispered, slowly stroking himself, moving his fist up and down his shaft, thumbing his glistening tip. 

“Fuck,” I moaned. “Y-you would be inside me, fucking me from behind, going all the way in and all the way out,” I stuttered

_Fuck, I was close_

“Christ, keep going,” he growled. 

“I would be moaning into the bed while you take my pussy, making my toes fucking curl,” I said in between moans. 

His chest was heaving, his face was flushed, and small moans were escaping him now. 

“You would be slapping my arse, so hard that you leave a handprint,” I said, my eyes starting to close from the sensation. 

“Now, _you_ tell me,” I said. I wanted to know everything— how he would take me, make me scream his name while my entire body trembled with ecstacy.

“I’d pull yer hair, making yer back arch,” he said. 

_Right over the fucking edge_

My body tightened, white-knuckling the sheets, my back arched, completely off the bed. Taking the vibrator from me, Jamie pushed it in deeper, and clicked it to the max setting, making me shudder. The first wave of many sending electricity through my whole body. Jamie held the vibrator inside me, the other part still on my clit. A string of expletives left my mouth. 

Another wave came crashing down on me, too high off my orgasm, I threw the vibrator off to the side. 

“Fuck, Jamie!” My body was still twitching, shaking from the intensity of my climax. 

“Jamie, come for me,” I breathed.

“Aren’t ye gonna help me?” he growled, still stroking his cock. I refused to touch him. I simply wanted to watch, but I decided to tell him what I would do to him instead. 

“Imagine me on my knees in front of you, stroking you. Swirling my tongue around the tip, licking the entire length of you, cradling your balls, while you lean against the bedroom wall, with your hand tangled in my hair.” I said seductively. His eyes closed at this, his strokes quickened, and small moans escaped him. 

“I will then take you in my mouth, moving my mouth and hands in tandem. You will groan and close your eyes, heavy with ecstasy. Placing my hands on your ass, I will pull you towards me , taking you deeper, while you thrust into me,” I whispered. I was sitting up now and drawing light circles on his thigh.

“Tell me what you want, Jamie,” I whispered seductively.

“I want to hear ye moan while ye take me deep in yer mouth,” he grunted and I moaned for him, as if he was fucking me. 

Letting his head fall back, a deep feral sound escaped him as he found his release. Pulling him up towards me, I wrapped my legs around his waist and hugged him. We stayed like this for a while, enjoying the feel of each other. We’ve been together for some time now and yet I’ve never felt as close to him as I did in this moment. 

“I would never do this with Gillian.”

**Author's Note:**

> Let me know what you think!


End file.
